It is official! I do not do well under pressure! I wanted to blog every day this week. I made a commitment to my Sparky peeps to do so. I wrote every day in December and have struggled to write a grand total of 17 posts in the past 3 months.
I know what happened in January. I know why I had limited time to write. I made a decision to focus my time and energy elsewhere most of that month with the intention of returning to my writing in February.
But something changed…
This has been my space to ponder out loud for over three years. This has been my space to process the thoughts inside my head. This has been my space to create with words. This has been my space to encourage and…on occasion…vent. This has been my space to release words. This has been an outlet for my voice.
When I returned to my blog in February, I decided that I wanted to do things a little differently than I had done in December and most of the past three years. I didn’t want to post just for the sake of posting. I wanted every post to mean something. I wanted every post to have a purpose outside the daily posting challenge. I wanted to write things with depth if I was going to write.
I am moving into a new season. I have felt it coming on for a while. I am about to do a new thing. God has prepared me. I have felt a tension to step forward…a longing for more…a resistance to the unknown of what that is.
God has called me to the edge and I don’t think He intends for me to just stand there and look at what is on the other side. I don’t know what is on the other side for me. I don’t know what that will mean for this space but I am certain it will take on a different look and feel as the season unfolds. I know because to think about it causes my words to lock up…which is a pretty good sign there is actually something important going on up in there that needs to be released and a battle is being waged to stop it.
I am not finished writing. I am not finished blogging. I am just finished releasing words for the sake of relieving pressure that builds up all up in there.
Well, except for this post which may have been just that! 🙂
Is it winter where you are? I don’t know if it is officially winter here on the calendar, but it was snowing earlier. It’s been a cold, wet weekend. I understand we can expect a lot more of this here the next few months. I am looking forward to the snow, assuming the forecasters are right and we will get more than average for this area of the country. I am looking forward to hunkering down under a blanket in a warm house.
Hunkering down under a blanket in a warm house is much more enjoyable than hunkering down under a warm blanket outside in the freezing cold air with a light mist falling on you. I did the latter this weekend and I can say I do have a definite preference.
You know…now that I think about it…life is much like that. Life can be harsh. There will be seasons that are cold and rainy. Living through them under the proper Covering is much better than living them completely exposed to the elements.
I think I’ll grab me a hot beverage and hunker down…how do you want to spend the winter?
Have you ever tried looking thru an outdated pair of prescription glasses after your eyes have fully adjusted to the new ones? Even though that old prescription used to serve you well and was once the one that made you marvel at the detail you had been missing in life up to that point, somehow they just don’t work anymore. It’s pretty hard to focus if you aren’t looking at life thru the newest prescription.
I realized this week that I’ve viewed parts of my life thru some old lenses. They were lenses that served me well in a past season. They were lenses that gave me clarity in a past season. They were lenses that helped me see the things in front of me that I needed to see to get to today.
They were lenses that fit the needs in my life at that time.
But I’ve been given new lenses and a new season. I’ve been placed on a new path. Over the course of time I’ve received an upgrade in my vision to go with my new set of circumstances. I was made for such a time as this and given a set of lenses made specifically for what I’d need to see today.
I think it may be what happens when you move in that space from glory to glory. Unlike most of our prescription glasses that need a stronger and stronger lens, I think the sight in glory to glory gets clearer as piece after piece of a veil is removed. As layer after layer of the old man is replaced with who God designed us to be, we see clearer. If we keep putting those old things back over our eyes, we can’t see well in the new life He has given us. It becomes distorted.
I don’t know what happens to you when you try to look at new things thru old lenses, but I well up with insecurities. I begin to see what’s wrong instead of a clear picture of God’s goodness He is trying to show me. I begin to judge my present thru the filters of my past and they become distorted. I begin to place myself in the middle of today’s circumstances as the person I used to be instead of the person I am. I default to the old instead of the new. I try to insert myself into places in my current circumstances that aren’t my place in this season and wonder why I feel so awkward there.
I am in a new season. I have a new place. I have new lenses. God has a plan and purpose for me that is different from the ones I served in before. Sure I’m still me. I still have the same skills and talents. I’m still the me He created me to be but I’m becoming that with greater clarity and with new purpose.
Lord, thank you for the new lenses. Thank you for reminding me to pick them up and use them. Without them I may miss seeing all that you have given me today.