Not without a Fight

I was talking with a group of ladies today about how God speaks to us.  Of course there are all sorts of ways and many of them were mentioned.  One that was mentioned was the way He will highlight a scripture to you and you KNOW He meant for you to read it in that very moment.  He meant for you to see something in it that you had never seen before…or never thought about quite the same way before.

That very thing happened today when we were talking about the story of Jacob and how he wrestled with God for a blessing in Genesis 32:22-31 and ended up with a blessing and a limp.  Right at that moment it occurred to me that Jacob was a born wrestler and contender for blessings.  I’d never really thought about that before.  Somehow the fight was in him from the very beginning.  The desire for a life of blessing was just a part of who he was.  He struggled with his twin brother Esau before they were even born.  He talked his brother into selling him his birthright. Then, with the help of his mom, he tricked his earthly father into giving him the blessing that was due Esau.  And then we are back to the beginning of this paragraph where he is wrestling God for a blessing…and he gets the blessing…with a cost.

So…what is the big deal?  Why did this story resonate with me today?  I think it resonated because I’m a wrestler…not a WWF wrestler…a wrestler with God.  Some people might think that is a bad thing.  He is the maker of heaven and earth.  He said it and that settles it.  He knows the whole story.  Who am I to question Him?

The truth is…when I’ve wrestled things out with God in my own life…He has answered.  He is big enough to take my questions.  He is very patient with my ranting and raving.  I’ve been working on a testimony for a retreat that I will go to in a few weeks.  That testimony came as the result of a time of wrestling with God.  He didn’t change my name, but He did bless me.  He did speak life into a place in me that needed that blessing.  As I type this, it occurs to me that there are many times of blessing in my life that followed directly behind a time of wrestling with Him.

And what about that limp?  Well…I’m not aware of anything worth having that doesn’t cost something…Although I do wonder if some things might go a little smoother and the blessings arrive a little faster if I didn’t fight Him quite so much.

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